- Alyssa Abrahamson
Are You Dysfunctionally Independent?
How many of us think we can do everything on our own?
Maybe we don’t want to appear needy, or we’re anal and think we’ll do it better than anyone else, or we don’t want to ask because of fear of rejection.
I used to tell myself that self-reliance was a sign of strength so I avoided showing anyone that I needed them or needed anything from them.
Priding myself on being fiercely independent, I truly believed it was weak to show vulnerability.
Hallelujah those days are long gone!
While being independent, self-sufficient, and self-reliant are vitally important and are healthy skills to have, for some it’s taken to an extreme. That’s when it becomes unhealthy and dysfunctional.
For some, excessive busyness or the need to do everything on your own disguises old hurts and wounds, and doesn’t allow for true connection with ourselves and with others.
(This used to be me!)
This badge of self-sufficiency and independence might be a story you’re telling yourself.
Being fiercely independent might look impressive or feel like strength and freedom on the surface, but there’s always something underneath driving this behavior.
If this feels familiar, it could be a pattern hindering you emotionally, psychologically, physically, and spiritually.
That’s what I ask you to consider in this week’s podcast episode, “Dysfunctional Independence.”
Are you too proud to ask for help? Do you pride yourself on being self-reliant? Do you have a fear of appearing ‘needy’ or a fear of reaching out only to be rejected? Trying to do life all by yourself may be your way of asserting to the world, "I have no needs. I can do it all.” Tune in today as I explain dysfunctional independence and how it may be defining your life. I will provide exploratory questions to help determine if you are dysfunctionally independent and investigate the root causes. I’ll share practices for managing and healing from dysfunctional independence.
Love, Your Wellness Coach,
October 27, 2021